Friday, March 30, 2007

Tag Schmag

Hey Sparky - You are gonna love this! (He won't leave the cave for days - just sit there drinking beer and shaking his head)

Okay, this blog has been tagged by a good friend, so I will return the favor. I have to tag it forward, in this case by nominating five more bloggers worthy of the award. Here’s how the originator of the concept puts it:"If you choose to carry this meme forward, remember to tag only those bloggers who stimulate your cortex....or something like that. Please make sure you pass the rules to the blogs you are tagging."
Rules; I hate rules - The participation rules are simple:
1. If, and only if, you get tagged, write a post with links to 5 blogs that make you think.
2. Link to this post so that people can easily find the exact origin of the meme.
3. Optional: Proudly display the 'Thinking Blogger Award'.

Thanks Bud, and the WTIT Blogger gang and we are passing this along to:

This first one is Neil. He is a little nuts and occasionally funny. He says he is a writer and web producer living in Los Angeles who writes about the humor of personal relationships and pop culture. Okay, whatever. Enjoy

Next is Mr. Fab and Pointless Drivel.
Just a collection of samplings from the cluttered mind, is the way he describes his blog. Well, that's original. It sounds like most other blogs I've seen, including this one. His has been around longer.

Next up is Ed Dague, a guy I like and respect a lot. He is smart and not afraid to speak his mind. Ed's blog actually does make you think now and then and it is about TV news, something that interests me.

The name of this next one is a bit of an inside joke. Written by a friend, this is another regional blog that covers issues relevant to Upstate New York.

This final site is of a nice spot in Westport, Connecticut. Had a few beers with the owner at a Syracuse Basketball game during this year's Big East Tournament in New York. This is a guy you want to have a few beers with. Go visit his joint, have a couple and say hello for Sparky and Stu and tell Mike we'll be stopping by to see him this spring; and Sparky will bring along that program from the first football game played in The Dome.

Okay; I'm done. You're it.

Thanks for the kind words, Bud. I'll be stopping by to see you on my trip to Westport.
Click on the WTIT link to the right for a few daily laughs.


Thursday, March 29, 2007

Stick 'em up

Will Brown is bidding the Bonnies against UAwbany to drive up his compensation package. Gotta love his pluck, but hey you do need to strike while the iron is hot. The Danes could be not so Great the next couple of years, so why not try to lock into a long-term deal for mucho buckos while you can? He is asking Awbany to pony up $275K, and likely wants them to sweeten the incentives package and add another year onto the end of the deal and then he will say never mind to Olean. If Duh Danes don't give him what he wants, he can go make $250-$300K at St. Bona for the next 4-5 years. Not bad.

Come on, give Michael Ray a little slack. So he insulted Jews, Gays, some random fans, a couple of referees, a local yokal sports columnist and maybe a few other individuals and groups I can't recall right now, it's not like he actually has the brains to realize what he did. By all accounts he is a very nice guy with not much on the ball (don't even think about it Anna), but the poor bastard has no clue how to conduct himself in a highly visible and responsible job like head coach of a professional basketball team. He'll be bouncing at some club soon and nobody will remember.

The Patroons are really entertaining though. You gotta like a team that is forced to fire the misfit they hired as coach right during the championship series, has a president and GM so outa touch he can't FIND the dog track, and then one of the players get ejected from a playoff game for punching another player; who just happens to be on HIS team. Can you say HBO movie boys and girls?


you heard it here first

Yo, putz
Let's see...stay in Albany, make about $175,000 per and be probably the fourth-highest paid coach in America East, or take $250,000 to coach in Olean. I'm figuring Will the Thrill tells Leroy Boy Is That You to take a hike, and packs up the wife and kid and heads to Bonaventure.
and the next coach of the Barkin' Dogs will be....ROB LANIER. Hey, you heard it here first,
Hey, how about them Patroons. They fly under the radar all year, and now get national exposure because Loose Cannon Richardson let's rip with a couple of f-bombs and contends that Jews are crafty. Micheal Ray hasn't gotten this much attention since he was suspended by the NBA for usin', and usin' and usin'. And Jim Coyne just sits there with a blank look on his face and says, "Huh?" Time to pin a nametag on that old boy and send him to the dogtrack.
Got to run...but I can't remember why. What was my name?

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Geno's gotta go

Hey, putz
Brand new bandwagon. Lots of room. Get your tickets early. Geno Aurriemma's got to go.
Maybe this is why no one gives a rat's ass about women's basketball. UConn is the No. 1 seed in the Fresno Region (why not just play the freaking game in Anchorage!) and LSU doesn't even have a real coach after Pokey got run out of town for. So what does LSU do? Blows UConn right out of the water! Hey, Geno, nice game prep, sport. Was it a surprise that Sylvia Fowles ripped you a new asshole? She's only the best female player on the planet (Sorry, Candace). Might want to devise a defense to stop her, Geno boy. Geez, Louise, go back to selling Italian pastries or whatever you're good at.
And who was the genius who put UConn and LSU in the Fresno Region? Championship game draws 3,000 in a 16,000 seat facility. BRILLIANT! Whoever is responsible is probably in line to be the next ECACHL commissioner.
Hey, Will the Thrill might not be so dumb after all. Interviews at St. Bona and comes back to Albany to find that LeRoy Boy Is That You has a big reward package for him for taking the Ungreatful Danes to the NCAAs. Can you say leverage, boys and girls? Wonder if Scott Marr is going to get the same reward package when he takes the Stickboys back to the NCAAs after being ranked in the top two-tree for most of the year.
Hey, my boss said something about being a team player yesterday. I quickly reminded him that there is no team in the word I. Geez, what a numskull.
Don't forget, you can't spell Wednesday without thenail.

Monday, March 26, 2007

Invest five minutes

Click on this. It only take a few minutes.

Whatever you think about the war, we sent them there. If you don't like the reasons they are killing and dieing, make your views known and the next time you get a chance, vote for someone who will only commit our troops to a war worth fighting.

We should require our president and members of congress to watch this, then think about their votes on this war. We shouldn't be there. We invaded a country illegally. But we are there and we can't just pull up stakes and come home tomorrow. Talk to other nations in the region. Get this settled and bring home those American Troops.


A Pox on the Sox

The Yankees will be fine. Wang will be back by May and Pavano will get two starts in April and then two tune-ups in September before the playoffs. He is going to be out with a bruised sinus in between.

They will get enough pitching from the gerital corps and will out score most teams. They will only need three of their 10 starting pitchers to be healthy in October and the rest will give them some depth in the bullpen.

The Sox? Well, the Sox will hang around most of the season, then fade in the fall. The Yankees will win the AL Pennant, then lose in the World Series. A-Rod will cry and leave NY for the Florida Marlins and Joe Torre will become coach of the Albany Patroons in a Steinbrenner trade for Michael Ray Richardson.


Thoughts From Fantasy World

Gotta love the pluck displayed here
(, but I’m growing more tired of the drivel pouring out of the mouths of some of these nut jobs. It is as bad as, and only slightly more outrageous than, some of the stuff our politicians utter.

The link takes you to a story about an Iranian governmental official who is ranting and raving against the Great Satan, again. No, not Sparky this time, but the good ol' US of A.

Look, our foreign policy is a disaster and our intelligence agencies are being made to look stupid by their bosses and the current administration, but these clowns in Iran and South Korea are starting to get annoying. I think it's time to tell them to go pound salt. We should get rid of Georgie Porgie, VP Darth Vader, Condominium Rice and the rest of that gang and get some folks who will not run the country like it's a freakin' Wal-Mart.
Then the new administration should issue a statement that says, look, the adults are back in charge here and the juvenile delinquents are back in their rooms without supper. We are sorry and we are going to try to start to clean up the mess we allowed them to create. But the two-bit murdering bastards that run places like Syria, Iran and South Korea need to know a few things about us:

We don’t want your sand flea-infested country.
We don’t give a shit what you do inside your own borders, as long as you don’t threaten us or our friends with it. Have unprotected sex with all the sheep and camels you want, just don't sell them to us as beef later on.

We only want to buy oil from you at a reasonable price. We don't want to own the wells. (You see, Bush and Halliburton will not be running this country any more)
We don’t care If you sick bastards want to blow your kids up. That's fine, just don’t do it near us or our friends.

We will leave Iraq and not start any more illegal wars for bogus reasons with little chance of success.

We understand that since we screwed up and destroyed Iraq that we need to lead the reconstruction effort.

We will not elect any more right-wing religious nut jobs who recruit equally greedy and nutty assistants to run America.

We will not elect any more left wing nuts who think that we need to solve every problem in the world right now.

We are not going to round up 12 million illegals in this country and send them back to Mexico, Central America and the Middle East.

We will start to enforce our immigration laws, and we will send the criminals, the wackos and the people who don't want to pay back taxes back to you.

And then I woke up. Time for a beer. Where did I put the Cheerios?

We need to have someone in the White House who will say to the rest of the world. We are going to live and let live. Don't mess with us, or our Friends and we won't bother you.


Who gives a sh......?

Yo, putz
It's Monday morning, I ain't hungover and I'm already pissed.
Who told sports talk geeks that the first thing they have to discuss on Monday mornings is what their families did over the weekend? Hey, moron, I don't care what your pampered-ass wife did with your pampered-ass kids unless it's something really kinky and weird, and then you're NOT GOING TO TALK ABOUT IT ANYWAY! Goood, God almighty, it's called sports talk radio because you're supposed to be talking about sports. Give me Imus any day.
Hey, a local meat market has fresh ox tails on sale. What say we get a couple pounds of those bad boys and kabob 'em? Ox tails and beer, can't be that bad.
Incredible to watch John Thompson The Original (all those numbers cornfuse me) and Patrick Ewing The Elder work their voodoo against the Shit Heels Sunday. Now Country Boy Roy Williams know how Custer felt. The Shit Heels just got waylaid in OT. I almost cried when that kid pumped in the three with seven seconds left. I'D NEVER SEEN A TEAM GET SHUT OUT IN OT BEFORE! Don't forget, Hoya paranoia will destroya.
Hey, putz, I was really sorry to see that the Yankees had to put Cheng Ming Wang on the DL and now, they're going to throw Carl (Could You Show Me The Way To The Mound) Pavano on opening day. It's tough to go one-and-done in a 162-game season, but I can see the cornerman picking up the white towel now! Must suck to be a Yank-Mes fan.
Results of Anna Nicole's autopsy come out today. I'm betting on terminal stupidity.

Friday, March 23, 2007

Blow it out yer ear

Okay, just gotta vent a little...
President Daffy Duck said today that the legislation passed that will set a deadline for bringing home the troops from Iraq, won't make any difference. The Clucks in Congress that gave the President, and his gang of wackos a blank check and then turned their backs have as much blood on their hands as Daffy, VP Darth Vader and retired Secretary of Defense Foghorn Leghorn.
This administration cherry picked the intelligence that seemed to almost justify the launching of an unprovoked and illegal war against a nation we had boxed in with no-fly zones and weapons inspections. The president said today that Congress has yielded its responsibility. Hell, these knuckleheads did that four years ago when they told Daffy, Darth and Foghorn it was okay to go trash Iraq and waste $500 Billion.

That said, we can't just say 'game' and take our toys and go home. Iran and Syria would love a vacuum like that to suck them into Iraq so they could divide up the country and all its oil. Time to impeach this beady-eyed numb nuts. We are in too deep to leave and don't know what else to do. What happened to the greatest country on earth? Easy, we turned our back and let a bunch of self-serving dimwits take over. Time to step up to the plate folks and pay attention. Let's get rid of all of them.

I'm gonna get a s12-pack, go over to the cave, and and watch Bugs Bunny cartoons with Sparky.

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Atta Boy Brownie

Whoops, wrong Brownie. Come on Sparky, will Brown can't be all that dumb. Olean in the winter? The Bonnies program is permanently mired in the muck. The glory days are gone for them. How you going to get enough qulaity basketball players, student athletes if you will, to go there, whithout massive quantities of cheating?

How about the guy they dumped? He comes into town on a white horse to pluck the program outa the gutter and they trow da bum out after four years because he didn't win enough. Nice! They had all sorts of knuckleheads in the program, including the coach and AD, before this guy. He comes in and keeps them off the police blotter and they gas him.

As for Will Brown, he's just going for the free weekend. They can't pay him a lot more than he's making; the program sucks; and he's in hooterville for crying out loud. He's not going there, unless they pass the collection plate a couple of extra times on Sundays and do something like double his salary, reprotedly about $163,000 a year. I know its the A10, but it's the bottom of the A10. Look what happened to the guy they just dumped. If Will goes there he better get some recruiting and admissions help and a long-term contract.

I hear the door opening and Gus is crying so somebody must be here. I'll cover Stony Brook later.

St. Brownaventure?

Yo, feeble one
You've got to stop hanging around with Zimmons. His stupidity is starting to rub off on you.
Hey, it looks like Will Brown might be packing up the family and heading to Olean, the Garden spot of New York. A couple of good years in Albany was enough for Will the Thrill, and besides, he can't imagine life without Jamar.
No guarantees that he's going to the Bonnies job, though. Interesting to see that one of the other candidates is Rob (You're Fired!) Lanier. Now, even though he doesn't have Will's resume, he will be coming from a bigger program, is a proven recruiter and was once an assistant in Olean.
Hey, nice move by Stony Brook to join the Big South for football. Let's see, Long Island...Charleston, South Carolina...yeah, I can see the connection. I just think old Chucky Priore was looking for a warmer climate for his games. He must have pictures of someone high up in the food chain at Stony Brook having sex with a chicken, because this move makes no sense to me at all. The only people on Long Island who benefit from this move are in the football program. I've got to get the Title IX people on speed dial.
Don't be picking on Tonya Harding. I was thinking she might make the perfect next Mrs. Sparky. Loves to drink and has no morals!

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

There he is

Read below and you will wonder why someone doesn't just blow this little rock to pieces. We continue to elect dimwitted thieves.

Hey Sparky; is Tonya Harding getting her meds from your pharmacist? She calls the cops because she is seeing things in her house, then has to be dragged out of her neighbor's place. Wow, she is soooo entertaining.

Oh, by the way; thanks for the information on Lewis Hamiliton. Nice to see the good ole boys are letting them black fellers participate in NASCAR now. I'm sure all the black sociologists will find it very exciting that now one of their own can spend all day in a car turning left.

You need to stop hiding in the cave for long periods. I think the dampness makes your brain mushy. Save some of those meds for me. I'll bring the Smithwicks to wash them down.

he ain't heavy, he's my brother

Yo, putz
Miss me? Still recovering from the drunken bimbo parade on St. Patty's Day. Head's still spinning.
Hey, knucklehead. The maintream press did it again. Wrapped up as they are in March Mediocreness, they missed the biggest story of the weekend. Remember this name, boys and girls...Lewis Hamilton. Lewis, who is only, 21, made history Sunday when he became the first black driver to compete in a Formula I race. Having a black driver in FI is like having a black man in the just doesn't happen. But wait, it gets better. Not only did he qualify for the Australian Grand Prix, he finished THIRD, in his first time out for McLaren. Can we say Tiger Woods here??? Lewis is British with Jamaican mon descent, and he's THE REAL DEAL. And he doesn't even get a line anywhere because every newspaper in the world is in love with Dick Vitale's ugly stepchild, March Moronness.
I'm goin online and ordering me some Lewis Hamilton gear.
Hey, in case you missed, attendance for the ECACHL championship game was the second-lowest EVER. Your buddy Hagwell is doing a heck of a job promoting this thing. And what was the deal with having part of the upper bowl curtained off, and portions open? This thing is turning into a three-ring circus, and every ring is full of clowns.
Things are getting so bad, I'm almost lookin' forward to stock car racing season.
Get my meds, I'm going down!

Monday, March 19, 2007

Empty Cave

I lost Sparky....again. The cave is dark and cold and...oh, just like always. As a matter of fact, that sounds like just about every room he enters. Maybe he is there. I'll go back and check.

Just a little break, here. Not much happening locally, unless you consider the annual dance of the legislators in Albany worth listening to. Is there any more self-absorbed, self-centered group of dirtballs this side of the Middle East? More when I feel like it.

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

still fumin'

Yo, putz
This whole NCAA thing is still pissin' me off. I've got to think the little drawf Gary Walters, who failed as a coach at Providence and who is so goddamed Ivy that he pisses green, was just getting a little payback at some of the schools that he looks down on, like Syracuse, Niagara, Drexel, at al. Ivy League ADs got no business being in charge of any sports committee, usless it's squash or fencing. Run his sorry ass out of town.
Here's an idea, and it ain't too far fetched. Expand the tournament field to 67 or 69, and have two-tree more play-in games on Tuesday. Make Central Connecticut and Texas A&M-Corpusule Count or whatever the hell it is earn the right to be a 16 seed and get their ass kicked. That way, a couple of deserving teams will get in and Fat Tuesday can eliminate a couple of the dregs that don't belong anyway.
Geez, Louise, Syracuse and South Alabama? Sounds like a bad spring trip baseball game at Fort Myers.
Good thing Quinnipiac isn't playing Dartmouth in the first game of the ECAC tournament Friday at the Knick. That would draw about as many people as a Brittany Spears lecture on the virtues of motherhood.
Hey, knuckedragger. If I'm a Virginia basketball player, I'm getting a little ticked off that the Big Dogs at Albany are feeling lucky about their draw. I don't see the Danes doing what they did last year against UConn. You can bet the Cavs want to make a statement to the Dog Pound. Hell, last year, I think Calhoun and his boys went out drinking the night before the game.
Speakin' oh drinkin', damned if it ain't nearly Nail Wednesday.

Monday, March 12, 2007

Hoop de Doo

Hey Sparky;
I wish you coulda heard Gary Walters on the Fatso and Fruitloops show this afternoon. He used the RPI and strength of schedule to justify Arkansas over Syracuse, then threw that argument out the window when asked how Stanford got in. He said they had injuries to key players and that contribute to their 18-14 record. Then he goes back to the RPI to justify Illinois and Purdue getting in.

It just doesn't matter. There are only about eight teams with a legitimate chance of winning the tournament anyway. If this was about crowning a worthy national champion and not making money for the En See Double Eh, they'd pick about 12 teams and let them fight it out.

I'm with you though on Billy Packer and the college basketball mafia. If you are going to artificially inflate the field to 64 1/2 teams, I'd much rather see some more teams like Northwest Southeast Missouri State than some team that goes 7-9 in the SEC and finishes about seventh in their league.

As for Siena, the ECAC and the TUC; blow it out your ear. It's marketing, dim wit. the P.T. Barnums of the world are ruling sports in this country (see above).

Hey Snooks, with Quinnipiac dumping Cornell I figure the over under on attendance at the ECAC Frozen four this weekend is about 4,500 each night.

As for Poke Me; who cares? Women's hoop in Luzianna? Can't draw even what the ECAC gets.

this is ridiculous

Oh, my achin' ass
Leave it to a former D-III coach and Ivy League geek to screw up one of the greatest institutions in American sports.
Pleeeeeeze, explain to me how Syracuse and Drexel get left out of the NCAA tournament and schools like Purdue and Illinois get in. Did the Big Ten commissioner quietly contribute to the Gary Walters' retirement (read, slush) fund? Hey, Gary the Geek, don't accept any packages from Jim Boeheim or Bruiser Flint.
This may be the worst field ever drawn and you know why? Because assholes like Billy Packer complained last year when so many mid-major teams got in, so this year the committee says, Fuck it, and rewards mediocrity in the major conferences. This is the biggest massacre since Little Big Horn.
And Will Brown is a nice guy, but giving Albany a 13? Get real. Wonder how long it took the good, ole boys to come up with a bracket where the Danes actually have a chance to win a game! Somebody must have owed Lee McElroy a favor, or was paying off an old golf debt. Syracuse doesn't get in and Albany is a 13? Boeheim's boys would beat the Dogs by 20, anytime, anywhere.
And you've got to stop drinking the Siena-ECAC kool-aid. I know you're taking money from just about everyone in the area, but I didn't know the Knick/Pepsi was part of the Putz Vacation Fund, too. RPI has as much chance to playing in the ECAC final four as they do of playing in the Beanpot! And tell me what a good idea it is to close off the top of the TUC when you want to see Stanford next year, and have to cough up 75 bucks, IN AUGUST, to see through the door.
And you know why Poke-Me Chatman isn't on the back page of every tabloid? Because it's Looziana, chump. They still haven't figured out what an inappropriate relationship is down there!
God, you aggravate me.

Sunday, March 11, 2007

What're U Smokin'?

Whatever it is, I want some. Snort this you goober!
Siena moved to the Knick/Pepsi/TUC for the amenities and the added seating for the couple of games a year they might need it. Nobody ever expected that they would average 10,000 per game. Hey, the rest of the league draws about 2,000 a game. Rich Ensor really needs Siena, or this conference will be relegated to the scrap heap of the NCAA.
This league can't even get their "automatic" bid into the real NCAA tournament. How far has this loop fallen? Their tournament champ Niagara has to play the elimination game just to earn the right to get smoked by Kansas. Wow, the committee must think those Purple thugs are actually from across the river in Canada and need to earn their way into the real field of 64.

As for the ECAC; they can't increase the draw if there is no chance of RPI getting to the final four. The move still made sense, because Albany is more centrally located, and if RPI does ever get there the place will be filled. Lake Placid is a great place, but if you don't ski a trip there every few years is plenty. Maybe they should send the tournament there every fourth year.
You are spending way too much time in the cave. With friends like you, I'm glad I keep that butt plug handy.

Saturday, March 10, 2007

can you get any dumber?

Yo, moron
Closing the upper bowl of the TUC is a good idea? What the hell have you been smokin? It's morons like you that make the administrators at Siena look good because you fall into line with anything they say.
Hey, dipshit, remember when Fast Phil decided to move the ECAC tournament from Lake Placid to Albany because the Knick/Pepsi/TUC had more seats and the tournament could draw more people? Check the attendance figures, Bevis. They're the same in Albany as they were in Lake Placid. Hey, why not limit the ECAC tournament to 7,500 people? Will make for a more energetic crowd because you'll get all the cowtippers from Colton sitting next to the stiff-upper-lipped crowd from Hanover. Yeah, let's go. Close off the upper bowl. Hell, may as well close off the press box, too! It's not too tough to see you're an administrator (what the hell do you do, anyway?) Clowns like you never admit you make mistakes. You just close the curtains and pretend nothing ever happened. Can't fill a big arena? Just make it smaller!!
Geez, you're a dope.
Your friend, Sparky

Friday, March 9, 2007

For Play

Hey Shit Hook; how stupid can you be? Open the front door and hit the golf balls into the hall. That way they bounce off your neighbor's door and don't damage your walls.

As for Siena shutting the top bowl of the TUC for their home games; it makes sense. Create the demand, fill the smaller arena and you will have a better, crazier atmosphere. Of course we are talking mostly old white guys who went to catholic schools, so how nutty can it get? They think having two beers and going to a gentleman's club to watch ugly chicks with fat thighs and no tits take off their clothes is a fun night out; unless there is a card game somewhere.

Gotta love the LSU sitchiashun. Coaches doodling players; just makes you want to send your daughter there.

Gotta go. I hear there is a Smithwick's with my name on it sitting on the bar at The Wood.

why not just lock the damn doors?

Yo, putz
I may have not done well in my logics class, but this one baffles me. Siena's attendance continues to go down (geez, there's a one wants to watch bad MAAC basketball), so they're going to limit the number of people who can get in the TUC by closing the upper bowl!
Nice idea. Cram everyone into the lower bowl and make it look like a bigger crowd. Hey, if you want big crowds, take the games back to Noah's ARC.
So instead of beefing up the non-conference schedule and maybe getting a crowd of 9,000 once or twice a year, they're going to limit seating to about 7,500 and you better get your tickets early! Do they really think that's going to create long lines at the walk-up window hours before a Siena-Canisius game? Maybe if they were putting some good basketball in the House That Jim Coyne Went To Prison For, they'd be putting some fannies in the seats. Maybe that's why I'd rather drive to Syracuse to see the Orange and DePaul than head down 787.
Hey, what about Pokey Chatman resigning at LSU because of ALLEGED inappropriate relationships with her players (pick a number between one and 100). Got to love lesbians! How much are those little indiscretions going to cost her? About a half-a-mil a year?
Got to head to Home Depot and get some spackel. Not a good idea to be hitting golf balls in the cave. Leaving too many holes.

Thursday, March 8, 2007

One more cementhead gone

Yo, putz
See where one of Nate the Skate's cementheads signed a pro contract Wednesday? Don't see any of Opie's "student/athletes" heading for the big show.
I think it's very interesting that one of Union's non-scholarship kids is bolting after just two seasons in beautiful Schenectady. Don't forget, this is one of the kids who was suspended from the team last February for an incident that was quickly swept under the rug. Let's see if the numbers add up...kid from Oswego...suspended...leading scorer on team...leaves school early. Yup, adds up to cementhead. Love to see what his GPA is.
Hey, how do I get a job with the Schenectady police department? Wanted...union rep...has to work 10 days a year...salary somewhere around $90,000 per year...must be available to work holiday to accrue overtime pay...Geez, Louise, do you think Anna can get me in?
Almost time for Round 2 of the Big East soiree to start. Got to see if Pasty and Eric can bring down the Drunkin' Irish.

Sunday, March 4, 2007


The way you begin most of your posts -"Yo, putz"- sounds more like the middle of a phrase than a salutation. You know, like "How come yo putz never seem to make it to the hole? I'm, talkin' 'bout your golf game here, not your love life.

Anyway, digressions aside, why is hockey suddenly the whipping boy of college administrations? It looks like they are focusing on hockey as a way of cutting costs the way they did when schools cut wrestling programs by the dozens about 20 years ago. First the Bemidji president pushes the blame for his money-losing program into the laps of the folks at the WCHA and now the UMass administration wants to kill the U-Lowell program? How do the two Division I programs in the Mass State University system lose $2.1 million? They must be talking about the athletic departments as a whole, right?
Anyway, moving out of Hockey East will not save money, but it might help rebuild a once proud hockey program. U-Lowell and Merrimack are perennial doormats in the league. Maine, BU, UNH and BC have dominated the league and the East pretty much since the league began. That won't change soon.
Lowell and Merrimack should move to Atlantic Hockey where most of the schools are teams they compete against in other sports. These traditional Division II powers can compete and maybe even dominate in the league populated by Bentley, RIT, Sacred Heart, AIC and Mercyhurst. Move Holy Cross and Niagara into the ECAC, close down College Hockey America and move Bemidji and Wayne State to the WCHA or CCHA and realign the college hockey leagues. The west should also realign and create a new league, but that won't happen for a while.

On the ECAC - You're right (man it hurts to say that), they need to cut the playoffs back to 10 teams again. They won't, because they went to 12 teams when the Ivies always had two teams missing the playoffs every year. With Union in the league, that shouldn't happen every year, especially if RPI can't get a goalie and some scorers; not to mention some players who prefer spending the first five minutes of the game on the ice rather than in the penalty box.
Nobody cares about these first round games, where all but one or two of the teams have no chance of winning on the road the next week, let alone actually making a run at the championship in Albany. Cut the bottom two teams out of the mix.

Give the top six teams a week off and have the next four teams play a two-game, first team to three points, series at the sites of the two higher seeds (#10 at #7 and 9 at 8). You only play overtime on the second night. If the first game ends in a tie, it's a tie. The second night you play until someone drops.

The survivors move on to the next round with the six top seeds. Continue the current format through the championship in Albany. You will get rid of a couple of bad first-round series that way, increase the attendance and interest and make the regular season more important. The last weekend of the regular season this year would've been interesting. The bottom four of RPI, Union, Yale and Brown would've been playing against each other for the chance to prolong their seasons. Two would've been done after the weekend. The other two would be playing for seeding in the first round.

I still think that you will get crowds like you did at the first round games, but at least there will only be two series instead of four. What is up at places like Princeton, where they drew 1,900 in two nights and Colgate (3,500)? Princeton is having its best season in more than a decade and Colgate has a proud hockey tradition. These places can't draw more people than that? This league needs help, immediately.
I'm done - time for a bloody mary.


Saturday, March 3, 2007

This ain't the Brady bunch

Yo, putz
Hate to take shots at slow, white kids, but did you see the scores of the Class AA boys' semifinals Friday night. Geez, Louise, Shen and Saratoga were just blistered by the Brothers and the other Brothers at Maginn (where's the love for my man Shimeek Johnson?). Welcome to suburbia, boys. The Suburban Council is a joke!
Nice job by Opie and the boys at the 'Gate. Heck of an effort against one of the most suspect offenses in the league. Hey, Ope, get 0ut the clubs. FORE!!!!
Did you catch all the empty seats at Hobey Baker Rink (still one of my favorites on the circuit, by the way). A whopping 825 showed up for what was the best game of the night, Brown's 4-3 overtime win over the striped homeboys (isn't that a kind of fish?).
Who you been talking to in Massachusetts, chief? Report is that the Massachusetts Board of Trustees want UMass-Lowell to, (1) get out of Hockey East or, (2) drop hockey entirely. Combined, the Lowell and UMass-Amherst hockey programs lost nearly $2 mil last year, and the good people on the board want to funnel the money into Amherst and leave Lowell as the ugly stepchild.
But that confuses me just a tad (doesn't everything?) How does Lowell stop losing money by going to another league, i.e., the ECACHL or Atlantic Hockey? A bus trip to Clarkson has to cost more than a bus to Merrimack. You gonna cut coaches' salaries because they have to match wits with Nate the Skate instead of Jack the Legend? Help me here.
What's that sound? Oh, I know. It's the first beer of the day opening. Must be noon somewhere.

Thursday, March 1, 2007

What, or who, is he smokin?

Hey Sparky thanks for sending me the Mike Eidelbes column form Inside College You gotta like the column (at the link above). This is a good column, with some funny stuff, but with some interesting observations, twists and turns.

The first part about the Bimidji program is great. The writer makes some interesting points and places the blame for the possible demise of the Bemidji State Hockey program where it belongs, with the school’s president. Writer Mike Eidelbes travels into Spin City in the second part. Could he be any farther up North Dakota Coach Dave Hakstol’s ass? I know that I’m in the minority here, but I don’t necessarily think that a couple of underage college athletes drinking in public and encountering the long arm of the law is all that unusual. We all make mistakes, especially at that age. Maybe bouncing kids off the team, like Coach Mike Kemp did at Nebraska-Omaha is a little harsh, but they knew the coach’s rules and at least he stuck by his guns and did what he thought was right.

Coach Hakstol has the right, and maybe the obligation, to keep the exact punishment, if there was any, of his players private if he can. However, for Eidelbes to say that the Omaha players got off easy because they got booted off the team and will not have to face the unfriendly taunts of opposing fans, while the North Dakota players will bravely take the ice in Denver and face the vicious taunts and bad language of a bunch of pimply 18-year old geeks as drunk as they were when they got arrested is just nuts. I have to take his word for it when he says that he is sure that the coach took appropriate disciplinary action, but don’t try to equate missing the last 3-5 weeks of the season with having to face bad language in opposing rinks. You think they never get that? Wow!

The Beanpot letter he ran was really entertaining, unless you’re Hockey East Commissioner Joe Bertagna or BU Head Coach Jackie Parker. The disclaimer at the start is funny as hell, however. Gay has no relation to sexual orientation and retarded doesn’t refer to mental capacity? Did Eidelbes read the letter? As they say in Boston, this guy Eidelbes is wicked retahded; not to be confused with Ricky Ricardo.